Hello. I'm new here. From what I'm getting out of this (after reading the info and some other posts) this is a place where people stressed out or just PISSED can post. Well, I want to add to that.
*clears out throat*
I'm 18. My name is Jes. I'm overweight, but happy. I've never had a boyfriend which doesn't bother me at all. Those are just a few things that make me upset. It's not about how I feel. It's about how everyone else feels.
I turned 18. I started smoking. My parents won't accept it. Even though they did it when they were 12 and younger. Do I want to quit? Sure. Am? Who knows? I'm such a good kid that I don't smoke in front of anyone. Not even my friends that do it. I didn't just start to start. I started because I was stressed out when my Uncle passed away and I was curious. My parents quit for a year and started at the same time.
I'm 18 years old. I think I'm pretty capible of making up my own mind. I don't need the folks running around telling me what I should be doing. I know what I should be doing and I'm doing it the best way I know how. Slow.
College is starting in September. But, because the financial aid office is always busy, I never get on to talk to my advisor. So, that means automatically...it's my fault. If I don't go to school, I never will. According to my parents, my family, friends, and the rest of the fucking world. Well, news flash to you all...I CAN DO IT! It might be hard, but I can.
Now to complain about the friends I have. Most of them I love. Though, Most of them I hate. My friend Bruce is one of them. He's gay. Is that a problem? No. Not at all. The problem is, he's a good looking gay guy who could have any girl he wants and knows it so he leads them on and then tells them "Sorry, Sweetie. I like cock.". He breaks their heart, then I have to hear about it. Because, according to him, it wasn't his fault. The girl was the one who couldn't take the hints. Well, WOAH! Maybe if you'd stop flirting with them, they wouldn't think anything of you. But, that's not a good thing. He has to have people think of him. That way, when he needs something, he can get it. Well, this is my story: Sunday we were supposed to go out for breakfast before I left to go see my cousin (who lives 2 hours away and wasn't sure when she was leaving for sure). Our plan was to go out at 10. That way, he could go and get something to eat before work and spend time with his "best friend". Sound bad? Nahhh. Not yet. If you knew me, you'd know I HATE HATE HATE last minute plans. Or, plans that are set at a specific time and then get changed to fit the OTHER persons schedule. Sorry, off track. Anyway, I called his house at 10 am. He wasn't even awake yet. So, I talked to his boyfriend while he was driving to work and stuff. Bruce had JUST jumped in the shower when he left. Which was about 11:00. Well, at about 11:30 Bruce comes to my house and asks me if I'm ready. I say I am. We walk out to his car, and he he's like "Here's the plan". I just sat there trying not to be pissed off. "We'll go to the New York Deli, get take out and eat at my work until 1. Then I'll take you home when Kyle comes in." That was it. I lost it. I got out of his car. Looked at him. Told him I was sick and tired of his last minute bullshit and slammed the door in his face. Haven't spoken to him since. But, this is the thing. I called one of his friends today (just to ask her were his boyfriend was because I have his library books at my house and they're 3 weeks late) and I found out that Bruce was telling a whole different story. I won't get into that story, but it was stupid. *sigh* That really hurt me like you have no idea. He and I used to be like brother and sister. We did everything together. Then, he got hot and I accepted that. He was Mr. Popular. He still spoke to me we hung out. It was good. Then, last summer we had a fight and I could have stopped talking to him then. But, he made me feel bad. So, I forgave him. The reason I wanted to go to breakfast with him was because we never hang out one on one anymore. So, I thought this would be good. Sit down at a resturaunt, catch up, laugh. NOT at his work where I have to hid in the back room so he doesn't get fired and so I can eat by myself. Am I wrong to be mad?